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Thursday, August 14, 2008
oh . i seriously need to change my blogskin . its hard to read posts although i love it . but nevermind , who bothers to read my posts anyway . today was the 2nd day when i need to "patrol" and get the Sec2s ready for morning assembly . Jeslyn(mypartner) and I went up to 2H alone since Rachael wasnt there until a little later . i was freakingout . i cant be firm enough to tell the sec2s what to do . its hard, believe me it is hard. especially on your own seniors . i feel so bad each time i point out the sec2s' "problems". e.g.; attire, whatever . rah. tell me VC, how the hell did you become a PPL. there's this situational test on Monday . i have a bad feeling im gonna do BADLY for it . people say im not firm enough . when i ask them to pull up their socks or just button up the first button, i go "um, excuse me, can you please pull up your socks?" AND I ADD IN A THANKYOU . i know thats dumb of me . i am dumb . what do you expect ? i was this cooking leader and i was suppose to come up with some list of stuffs that the class is willing to provide or not for the dinner meal . it was helluva RUSH . like how the hell am i suppose to know all the ingredients and amount at this time ? slappingmyselfagain. gah . im sorry class, i seriously dont remember who i promised and what i promised to check out for you. im in a mess today . i was . seriously . omfg . my geog sucked . you should have seen it . i just passed . i have this bad feeling im gonna fail science . stupid of you Vanessa to have just focused on what YOU think was going to come out and it didnt ! good on you . i studied all the wrong stuffs and all the stuffs that came out were those that i just skimmed through and didnt go and memerise or anything . why didnt rivers came out ? i did 3 practice essay for that . it sucks . i really does . the feeling , the sight , everything . i cant even remember if there's any homework today . i cant . i cant believe dad's gonna work overseas for like ½ a year . and i hate myself for how i have been treating him for the last 13 years . i have been stupidly taking him for granted . i dont know what's gonna happen to me when he's not here, not around . there'll be no one talking to me about throwing , about swimming . no one's going to ask me about my day any more . no one's gonna ask me about how im coping with school . no one's gonna cook me food when im hungry in the middle of whoknowswhattime anymore . everything's gonna be different without him around . i dont know . Icanhardlyrememberwhenilasttalkedtoyouproperly 7:39 PM
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